Helping others helps yourself

I wasn't quite sure what I wanted to write about today, but I decided that since I was ranting in the last 3 posts, that I would write about something more positive tonight.
Volunteering is a great way to fill in down time that would be spent sitting around going "I'm bored, what is there to do?". I know personally because I partake in quite a few volunteering activities. For those of you who are unemployed, volunteering is a great way to fill your day that a) makes you feel better about yourself because it gives you the feeling of accomplishment and b)it looks good on any resume. I learned this from John Tesh, so I can not claim total credit for this! But if you have volunteer time down on your resume that you are involved with when you apply for a job it shows the potential employer that you Want to be out there doing something and you Want to stay active. Also a lot of companies like to be involved in the community so they are more likely to hire a person who is involved on their own. Basically it come down to the fact that you keep your mind busy and your helping out more than just yourself. With the economy in the shape it's in, there are a lot of soup kitchens, churches and other community organizations that are more than in need of people willing to give just a few hours a week.
I personally volunteered at my local library, as a member of the Friends of the Library (where I'm the secretary) it made sense and I knew the manager needed some help. If I didn't have that, I would have went nuts the 2 or 3 months that I was unemployed! I personally, enjoy volunteering, and now that I have work, I still try to help at the library when I can and I'm also a member of the Business and Community Association in my town which has events and things all through the year. Several years ago my mom and I put on the car show, but she moved and I laid low for awhile, so we no longer have that event. I've recently really tried to get involved again and do things for the community.
Something that kind of goes along with volunteering, that I decided to include in this post, because it is still helping people, is donating blood. I am reminded of this sitting here at the computer looking at the postcard reminding me that the 17th is the next time to donate. There is a huge need for donors and you never know who's life you are saving. I understand that some people can not donate, but there are other ways that you can help, like having your organization sponsor a blood drive, or to donate snacks water and juice for the donors afterward. I try to donate as often as I can, but I do fight with low iron so I'm not always able to. It's just something to think about.
Well, I need to finish up, since it's getting windy as heck and the lights are starting to blink. I do believe we have a storm blowing in! So here's something a little more positive. :)

Just because I'm a girl, doesnt make me required to bear children

Since I've been on the rant about single-dom and such, it seems fitting that I roll right into the rant about having kids. Why does everyone think that because I'm a girl, I want kids, or should have kids? Just because I have a uterus doesn't mean I want kids. A desire to have children is a reason to have them, and I just don't have that desire. I get so tired of every time I say that I don't want kids the person I'm talking to argues with me. Hello! My body, my life, MY decision. If I say I don't want them be fine with that answer. Don't try to tell me what I should think or feel! I do not want to be prego. I do not want to put on all the weight that I've lost in the last year or so. I do not do the three p's (poop, puke, pee). I do not have the patience for the crying and the screaming and all that crap. i baby sat for a good number of years, Ive put my time in, and I don't want anymore! I don't know why some people can not accept that some women do not want kids. Just because you wanted them, doesn't mean I do. I think part of my problem is that I have such a mothering instinct towards my friends. But this does not mean I want to push something the size or a watermelon out a hole that is like the size of a cucumber, or to have my stomach stretch out to gargantuan sizes! It took me long enough to lose the weight I did lose, and I'd like to lose more, not put it all back plus some!! I don't even like to hold babies anymore, and some girls don't understand this either. Some get joy from it, others would rather not have to. So please, accept my decision to not want kids and don't tell me that I will change my mind or tell me I do want them.

You just think you do.

It drives me crazy when people say they need a boyfriend or they need a girlfriend. No, you don't. Water, is a need, shelter is a need, food is a need. A boyfriend or a girlfriend is not a need, it's a want. You do not need another person to be complete, you are the only one who can make you complete. I kinda started this in my last rant, but I think it's a topic that needed it's own rant, because I hear people all the time. "I need a girlfriend", or "I need a boyfriend", or "I'm only happy when I am with someone". The only reason you're only happy when you're with someone is because someone filled your head with a bunch of crap! I may not be happy all the time, heck I may be miserable a lot, but it's not because I'm single, being with someone isn't going to make me magically happy. I was raised to be independent. My mom told me that the day I had to count on a guy for anything is the day I lose myself. I'm the only one that I can count on to take care of me. Don't get me wrong, I'm not one of those feminist women that won't let a guy do anything for me, because believe me, there's nothing wrong with a guy doing things for me, I'm just not going to count on them. I've been on my own for 3 years, and I've always been single. I pay the rent, I provide food, phone, internet, a car, insurance (on the apt and car) and anything else that is necessary for survival. I clean and I keep my fish alive and swimming. There is NO guy here to do that for me. Some male company is nice from time to time but this is MY home, not anyone else can claim it. No One will tell me where I can go, who I can hang out with or talk to, or how anything needs to be. I work hard for my money and I''ll be damned if I'm going to start needing a guy now. So basically what I'm saying is no, you don't need a guy. You need to be yourself, not part of a couple every minute. Have your own thoughts and opinions and not be influenced by anyone else. Make your own life choices and know the value of being able to say "I did that". Everything is always more appreciated when you earn them on your own. And please, don't end a perfectly good relationship to go out and forge a path in single-dom, but make sure that you both understand that you need independent selves as well as together selves. We were all born separate human beings (well most of us!!) and so we were not meant to become a single person when in a relationship. Remember, you don't Need someone else, you want them.

What part of, don't even think about it, don't you understand???

I guess since I'm hitting such hard hitting topics right off the bat, we'll hit this one, since it's been quite popular lately. What part of I DO NOT WANT TO BE FIXED UP WITH ANY GUY do you not understand. I'm not into blind dates, I don't care that you think this guy is so nice. Leave me alone. I will purposely not even look at a guy if I know you are trying to fix me up with him, ask my mom, she tried that shit with this guy and I wouldn't even look at him. I am not a science experiment, I am not a zoo exhibit, and I think whatever poor sap guy you're trying to con into this feels the same way. Talk about freaking awkward, at least for me anyway. Id feel like a freaking kid trying to give the State of the Union Address with no warning or prep. I am not designed for this, or dating period. And any guy you try to fix me up with would probably hate you afterward anyway. I have no desire to be put through this cruel and unusual torture. That's illegal you know. And this is kinda on the same topic, but a little off; There are to leagues, I don't care what miss "make up will help your self esteem" thinks. There are people who are "out of ones league". A person can not have Anyone they want, face it, it's not going to happen. I'm not saying that we are still in the caste system or something like in olden day England, but it's true, I think everyone has a "range" that if they're going to find a guy, that's where he'll fit into. Ok, back to the original rant. Sticking someone with some strange guy is not a fun time, period. And just because you think you're happy because you have a guy doesn't mean that it's what's best for me. Quite frankly I think it would probably make things worse as of right now. Guys do not define our happiness, you can be happy or miserable either way. Also, guys do not fix broken hearts or wounds. The damage is still there, you just let him put a blanket over the wound, that's all. They do not have the power to fix it. I hate to break it to anyone who believes they can. YOU are the only one that can fix you. And the way I look at it, if a guy wouldn't have broke it in the first place, it wouldn't need effing fixed! Now I don't want anyone thinking I'm anti-guy or a lesbian or something, because I'm Not, I just have a stronger sense of reality than some people. LOL!!If by some strange cosmic event, I'm not destined to be alone, I will do it on MY terms, Not anyone else's. My life and my heart and my emotions are not to be entertainment for someone else. They are mine. So anyone even remotely thinking about fixing me up, just back off and leave me alone. And come to think of it, they say you have to love yourself before anyone else can love you, so quite trying, fate is telling you that you're wasting your time.

The key to self esteem....is make up????

So, anyone who knows me, knows that I lack self esteem and self confidence; Well today I learned the secret to getting more of both. Who knew that all I had to do was use some clown sticks and poof, like magic I would feel better about myself. Now, anyone who really knows me, knows how effing sarcastic I'm being right now, and that whoever in the world made this ridiculous comment doesn't know the first thing about me. I do, however, find it rather amusing, in the least. At first I thought it was just her being personable, and she wasn't really serious. I later realize that she's serious, and obviously crazy. I'm sorry, make up fixes nothing, in all reality, it probably creates more problems. For example, guys, how many times have u seen a girl at a club or a bar or whatever and was like, well, she's pretty, but then when u wake up next to her in the morning without all her make up, you're like, holy crap what happened!!! LOL And then of course there is the cost of buying all the stupid shit, and then the time wasted putting it on. This is time that I could be sleeping and money that I could be saving up for a new car. I am not a make up person in the slightest. I look at it like this, if someone is going to not like me or like me, I want them to do it for me, who I am, what I look like, not what I'm trying to be. (plus, y'all know that I'd stab myself in the eye w/ the stupid mascara anyway!!!) Of course, with make up comes hair styling like straightening and curling and hairspray and all those wonderful things that a)cost more money and b) kill your hair. My hair falls out fast enough, I don't need to hurry it along. Plus, everyone that knows me, knows that I am straightner-tarded. I just get frustrated when I try to operate the stupid thing and I usually give up. This is why I get my hair cut in a simple style. I take it out of the towel, comb it and go. That's it, no fuss. I am not a girley- girl. I do not like all these sissy things. It's not who I am, and it's not going to fix ANYTHING! I'm not going to hide away from the truth that I know. I'm going to face each day as me. It doesn't matter who likes me as long as I get up, go to work, and pay my taxes. This blog post could lead me into so many other rants, but alas, I must get to bed, I'm so tired. So anyone who ever thought of trying to tell me I should wear make up can just hole up that comment, because now you know I ain't gonna listen and you're wasting your breath...